Wednesday, April 29, 2009

So I didn't want to bore mySELF with tales of how horrible this experience is. But the good news just keeps on coming.

So I go to the clinic. And of course I need surgery. But not only do I need surgery, but I'm lucky enough to need "the pin." Woohoo! Yes, yes, the pin! How exciting! So here's the deal. I have two breaks in the fibula, and apparently the fracture is unstable. Therefore, I need an open reduction internal fixation to correct all the damage I've done. The surgeon will set the bone and then put a plate and God knows how many screws into my ankle so that it heals properly. But here's the fun part, since the ligaments are also damaged, and the ligaments support the bone, I need a pin that will hold my ankle together (picture a toilet paper dowel running across the length of my ankle holding the bones together) so the bones don't spread while the ligaments are healing. Now why, you might want to know is that the news that beats all other news? Well, because if I didn't need the pin, I'd be healing in 6 weeks, but... since I DO need the pin, I'll take 12 weeks please. Yep. Me... the one who was crying about ONE week, is now sentenced to 12. That's just great.

I don' t know how I'm going to get through this. I'm not even kidding. I mean I know I logically will, because I have to, but you can't understand what this feels like. I'm soooo very upset. I don't understand why this had to happen. I have my first final on May 4th, the second on the 5th, the third on the 6th. The surgeon scheduled my surgery for the 7th - and then of course I've got one more final on the 11th.

This is just fabulous. If it weren't so damn sad I'd laugh.

And I spoke to an insensitive idiot, who, after I told them I needed surgery, said to me, "Well, there goes your summer." Thanks Captain Obvious. And fuck you. And then as if that weren't enough, when I told them I had a final AFTER my surgery, they said, "You're not going to be able to take that test." Again, I say fuck you - I might cry, but you know nothing about my resolve. I WILL take that exam. Yes, I will.

But for now, I'm worried about my FIRST exam. WTF, how the hell can I study - I fall asleep every two seconds, my body is WORN OUT.

But I'm studying the best way I can.

And yeah, this sucks.

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